What this quiz measures
Moving in together changes a relationship's operating system. The affection may be familiar; the tiny decisions are not. Who buys toilet paper before it runs out, how late can someone work, what happens when one person needs quiet, and whose standard decides when a room is clean? These are not trivial questions once they recur daily. This check looks at tendencies that can shape order, social energy, reliability, caution, trust, and the willingness to compromise.
Make the arrangement visible before signing anything. Talk through rent, deposits, ownership, debt, guests, chores, sleep, food, work-from-home space, pets, time alone, and what happens if the arrangement ends. Put practical agreements in writing, even if the document feels unromantic. Writing does not predict failure; it prevents each person from assuming that their private default is universal. The best agreement includes a way to revisit itself after the first month, when the imagined home has become a real one.
Use a trial where possible. Spend enough continuous time in one place to meet the unglamorous routine, then debrief when nobody is already angry. Notice which issue is about a preference and which is about fairness, money, safety, or respect. The result can make your own defaults easier to name. It cannot determine whether a lease is affordable, replace legal advice, or assess whether either person feels free to say no.
The six things it looks at
The six measured parts cover preference for structure, capacity to cooperate, appetite for company, reliability, trust, and care before acting. They can explain why the same flat feels orderly to one person and constrained to another.
Orderliness
How much structure you keep around you: lists, systems, clear surfaces.
Most people score between 7 and 18 out of 20.
- Like to tidy up.
- Often forget to put things back in their proper place.
- Leave a mess in my room.
- Leave my belongings around.
Cooperation
How much you would rather compromise than fight, and what it takes to make you fight.
Most people score between 10 and 20 out of 20.
- Love a good fight.
- Yell at people.
- Insult people.
- Get back at others.
Gregariousness
How much you actively want company, crowds and the noise of a group around you.
Most people score between 6 and 17 out of 20.
- Love large parties.
- Talk to a lot of different people at parties.
- Prefer to be alone.
- Avoid crowds.
Dutifulness
How binding a rule or a promise feels once you have accepted it.
Most people score between 13 and 19 out of 20.
- Keep my promises.
- Tell the truth.
- Break rules.
- Break my promises.
Trust
Whether you assume people mean well before you have evidence either way.
Most people score between 8 and 18 out of 20.
- Trust others.
- Believe that others have good intentions.
- Trust what people say.
- Distrust people.
Cautiousness
How much thinking happens between the impulse and the action.
Most people score between 8 and 18 out of 20.
- Jump into things without thinking.
- Make rash decisions.
- Rush into things.
- Act without thinking.
What this is built on
Defaults runs on the IPIP-NEO-120, a public-domain 120-item Big Five inventory developed by Dr John A. Johnson. Each short quiz uses 24 of its actual items, word for word, and scores them against Johnson's published adult norm tables rather than rescaled against your own answers. The same 24 count toward the full 120.
This page applies public-domain personality items to a shared-living decision. It does not assess housing quality, tenancy law, financial affordability, relationship safety, or a partner's behaviour.
- Johnson, J. A. (2014). Measuring thirty facets of the Five Factor Model with a 120-item public-domain inventory. Journal of Research in Personality, 51, 78-89. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jrp.2014.05.003
- International Personality Item Pool. https://ipip.ori.org/
Common questions
What should we agree before moving?
Cover money, chores, guests, sleep, work, private time, and what happens if one person needs to leave. Use examples from a normal week. Agreements are more useful when they name an action, an owner, and how you will revisit them.
Do we need the same habits?
No. Differences can work well if they are visible and neither person becomes the unpaid manager of the other. The question is whether you can negotiate a fair system rather than treating one person's preference as the default.
Should we do a trial first?
A trial can reveal routines that short visits hide, provided both people can leave it without pressure. Treat the debrief as data: what was easy, what caused friction, and what agreement would make the next period fairer?
What should I do after the quiz?
Bring one result-related tendency into a practical conversation. If you value order, discuss the system rather than criticising mess. If you avoid conflict, agree how either person can raise a concern early. The move is safer when the hard topics are already speakable.